Living with a
Cheating Spouse?
Divorce Advice for Women
It seems like everyone has known about your
cheating spouse except you. Is it a
coincidence that the topic of "divorce advice for women" has been on
everyone's mind lately?
Living with a cheating spouse hasn't been easy, but you've decided that you've
really had enough: You just can't keep on living with a cheating spouse under your roof.
If you're going through this awful feeling of betrayal yourself, here's some
divorce advice for women to help you get through it. Read these tips on dealing with a cheating spouse
today.
Divorce Advice for Women
Tip #1: Take Care of Yourself
Divorcing a cheating spouse can shake up your emotions in ways that you never
thought possible. Take good care of your mental, physical, and emotional well-being in order to think clearly and
get through this. A relationship coach can help.
It's normal to go through emotions as intense as those when there's a death in
your family. You may initially experience shock with the realization that the man you've loved has turned into a
cheating spouse - and that your marriage may now indeed be dead. You may then experience anger, followed by
depression. All of this is going to hurt - and hurt deeply. And there's just no way around it.
But there are some healthy things you can do for yourself that
will really help you get through this. Here is some divorce advice for women - and some ways to take care of
yourself - while making plans to leave your cheating spouse.
Divorce Advice
for Women -
Get Rest and Exercise
Get plenty of rest. When dealing
with a cheating spouse, your emotions may be frequently in high gear. It's important that you listen to your body
and take plenty of time to rest. Do whatever it takes to get a good night's sleep every night (including seeing
your doctor).
Take time to exercise. Working out
your anger may be easier while doing aerobics. While some women use a punching bag and others take up kickboxing,
choose the form of exercise that will give you a fair chance to vent.
Spend Time Away from your Cheating
Spouse
Spend more time with your friends.
We all need the encouragement of caring family and friends. It's especially important, while going through the pain
of divorce, that you surround yourself with loving support. Your friends will understand your ups and downs, and
you won't have to pretend to be happy. This is the place to get the nurturing that you haven't been getting at
home.
Get involved with a hobby or take a
class. There's nothing like a creative distraction to take your mind off your troubles and woes. Something
as easy as a yoga class twice a week can help you get centered and relaxed.
Divorce Advice for Women -
Eat Well and Avoid Drugs
Eat well and take extra vitamins.
At times when we're feeling extra stress, it's especially important to eat balanced meals and take extra
supplements too. With the advances of today's food science, there are stress vitamins and herbs that you can take
to relax. Talk to a nutritionist and get some recommendations for supplements that will keep you feeling calm and
tranquil.
Avoid drugs and alcohol. Some
handle stress better than others, and there will always be the temptation to drown out your feelings and not face
them. Doing this will defeat your purpose though, since your feelings will be vital to your healing. Drowning them
out today will only result in excess baggage later. Using drugs and alcohol only compounds the problem and makes it
worse. Stay away from anything illegal - and only drink alcohol with the approval of your doctor.
Avoid your Cheating Spouse -
But Don't Escape through Sex
Don't escape through sex. Feeling
unappreciated at home can sometimes lead to one-nighters somewhere else. When your guard is down - and no one's
around - it's may be tempting to have yourself a tryst. Once your divorce is final, there will be plenty of
opportunities to escape through sex. But until then, don't jeopardize your divorce settlement by disappearing late
at night to meet a lover. Such acts nearly always get discovered - and can be used against you until you're
officially divorced.
A Cheating Spouse and Your
Emotions
Ride your emotions instead of letting them
ride you. There will be days when you'll find yourself on an emotional roller coaster ride - feeling the
peak of anger one day - followed by sadness and depression the next.
Yes, you want to stop the ride, but you can't (nor should you) deny how you feel.
Expressing your emotions in a healthy way is best. Meet with your close friends, write in a journal, talk to a
relationship coach, or join a support
group where you can hear how other wives have dealt with the pain of a cheating spouse.
Divorce Advice for Women Tip #2:
Talk with a Relationship Coach to
Help You Deal with Your Cheating Spouse
With today's uncertain economy, you may decide to live with your soon-to-be-ex
until a divorce settlement is made. Although you'll learn that any talk of the divorce should be between your
attorneys, you may be tempted to confront your cheating spouse too.
A relationship coach can provide a safe
environment for you to explore all of your feelings, while supporting you during this most difficult of
transitions. Take advantage of this support, which will make your life a lot easier.
Divorce Advice for Women Tip #3:
Find a Really Good Divorce Attorney
Without a doubt, a cheating spouse is grounds for divorce. Dealing with the
process of divorce is difficult enough, and you don't need an attorney to make it even harder.
Before meeting with a divorce attorney, there are several steps that you should
take to ensure that you will have success with an honest professional who will help you navigate through all of the
legal chaos.
Do your homework before suing your cheating spouse for divorce: Be sure to do
extensive research on the credentials of several divorce attorneys in your area. To increase your chances of
finding someone you are very comfortable with, ask friends for a recommendation of an attorney who has an excellent
reputation and a proven track record with divorce settlements.
Divorce Advice for Women - Listen to
Your Gut Feelings but also be Prepared
Listen to your gut: It's likely your intuition helped you catch your cheating
spouse in the first place. Be prepared for the initial consultation by coming up with all the questions you'll want
to ask to get a good sense of whether or not you can trust the attorney. If you end up hiring the attorney, you'll
have to listen to his or her advice and follow it to a tee. Although you'll have to be pro-active with any attorney
to be sure that all your needs are met, you'll want to choose someone who will work hard on everything that is in
your best interest.
Support your own cause: Help your attorney protect you and your assets by
compiling a list of all of your financial information - especially paperwork regarding joint accounts and credit
cards. To avoid giving your cheating spouse an unfair advantage, you will have to cover every base. This often
involves proving your credibility. Document anything and everything that can be used to support your position, and
bring it to your appointments.
If you follow this divorce advice for women as best you can, you'll be on the
right track toward moving on from a cheating spouse and into a much better life ahead.
Relationship
help is just a phone call
away!
Website Content © 2012 Jay Reiss, M.S.W.
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